I am Xin. At the end of May 2025, I finished my studies in the UK and returned to China after graduation.
During my second year in the UK, I came to believe in the Lord and was baptized in the following year. I thank God that during my time studying in the UK, he continually kept me, fed me with his truth, and allowed me to grow in spiritual maturity, learning to rely more on him. I thank the Lord for giving me a deep hunger for his Word and truth, and a heart willing to follow him more closely.
However, I now understand more clearly: faith that has not been tested is fragile and mere talk.
But thanks be to the Lord. Though I am now in my homeland, where faith faces persecution or obstacles, God is faithful. As long as we bring everything to him through prayer, petition, and thanksgiving, he will guard our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
For he is the God who works all things together for good, and he desires to use our circumstances to draw us closer to him, and to teach me that I cannot rely on myself alone.
As I now understand it, I cannot depend on myself. If I am apart from God’s Word, I am like chaff blown away by the wind. Living in this sin-filled world, it is easy to fall into the enemy’s trap and lose life.
Now I bring more of Scripture into my reflections. I understand that Peter did not deny the Lord because he did not want to, but because he was weak. Samson was not rebellious in nature, but his life was bound by many things from the world.
I have come to deeply realize that no one can be victorious by relying on themselves, nor can anyone boast in their own ability, talent, or strength.
When Peter and Samson were filled with the Spirit of God, they were immediately filled with courage and strength—proclaiming God’s Word and overcoming countless enemies through the Lord. They were vessels; the one who truly wins the victory is the Lord.
We are not stronger than Samson, nor do we have more experience than Peter. We are often weak, even falling without realizing it.
Therefore, we must examine ourselves regularly, searching out the corners of our lives where we have strayed from God, recognizing them in time, and turning back to him.
Brothers and sisters, when we turn back and confess our sins, God will never hold our sins against us, and he will never reject us.
For in Jesus Christ, we are not dead—what he gives is eternal life!
On Calling
While I was in the UK, God clearly gave me both a stirring in my heart and Scripture as confirmation.
For example, Paul, as an apostle to the Gentiles, was called to bring the gospel to all nations and peoples, so that all might hear it—being sent to preach in many places.
Yet, as a Jew, he did not despise his own people. Even when burdened with slander and misunderstanding, he still cared deeply for those trapped in the chains of law and works—for those who regarded heritage alone as the mark of God’s chosen people.
They had not been reborn in the Spirit but were still dead. I believe he never forgot or abandoned his fellow countrymen and prayed to God for them day and night.
For God has not abandoned the Jews whose hearts are hardened. According to his promise, he will still save them, for the gospel and salvation are for all people.
Therefore, as the only one in my family who studied abroad, I believe my greatest gain from those years was coming to know God and to believe in him.
God also moved me to become a channel of the gospel to my family, friends, classmates, childhood companions, and even strangers I meet.
For the end of all things is near. Whether in season or out of season, I must seek God’s heart—loving one another and laboring diligently.
Although my family has also rejected this message—their view being, “We believe only when we see. You can believe in God; but have you seen him?”
I have explained to them the meaning of faith in response to this kind of questioning.
Yet I still pray for the Holy Spirit to work, to open their spiritual eyes; for their unbelief comes from not knowing, and they still need God’s mercy and light.
God’s work is always wonderful and worthy of great praise. In the two-plus months since returning home, I have done my best to share the gospel—awakening many friends who have family members that believe and moving former classmates to begin understanding the meaning of the gospel and God’s love.
On My Present Situation
God has led me to work at a state-owned enterprise in China in the field of advanced technology.
The environment for faith here is different from abroad—there is no freedom to openly share the gospel.
Because I shared the gospel openly on my social media, my supervisors and colleagues found out, leading to some persecution, even threats for me to leave.
Of course, my supervisors claim they are thinking of my career—encouraging me to move from a disciple’s life to that of a mere nominal believer and gradually attend church less.
But I thank God for keeping and enabling me to hold firmly to my faith and to be careful not to sin against them with my lips.
For what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul?
At the same time, I know God is using this environment to further break my old self so that I rely on him more.
The end of all things is near; therefore, we must be self-controlled and sober-minded in prayer, and above all, love one another.
Affliction produces endurance, endurance produces character, and character produces hope.
Since returning, I feel I have grown closer to God and have come to know him better.
In my work, I also seek to glorify God—promoting harmony among people, being salt in the world, so that they may see God’s work in my life and my reverence for him.
I thank God that his grace and steadfast love never leave me.
When storms arise, I know I must be still and know that God is with me, granting me peace and rest in his care.
Moreover, God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
Therefore, though the earth changes, though the mountains are moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling—we will not fear!
Conclusion
Thanks, and praise be to our Lord, who, according to his will, sends forth courageous messengers who rely on God, returning to the land of China so that this land long in darkness may be lit again.
And he will confirm the message we preach by accompanying signs and wonders!
May God’s kingdom come and bless his children who live according to his heart.
Editor’s note: This article was originally written in Chinese and was translated and edited by the ChinaSource team with permission.
